Hey, Good Looking.

I really don't know what to call this post, other than the "my-husband-checked-my-blog-and-called-it-pathetic-because-I haven't-updated-in-so-long" post. So really, that title is for him, since he snoops on my blog. But also for you. You are quite attractive as well.

So let's see.  News.  DEAD RIVER is releasing in only a few weeks!  Are you excited?  This will be my fifth book and I'm kind of shocked I've lasted this long. (Okay, I almost didn't.) 

Anyway, it's based on a whitewater rafting trip I took with my husband and his friends on the Dead River in Maine.  (Side note to Mainers: I am sorry to disappoint you if you thought this was a book about the gas station). We lived in Maine, once, a million years ago, until the madness set in. Being quite timid and completely unadventurous, it's a wonder I even made it out on a river called The Dead. What was I thinking?  I will tell you three things I learned during that trip:

1. I look like a black garbage bag filled with potatoes, in a wetsuit.
2. If you give me a life-saving paddle AND a granola bar during the trip, expect that I will drop the life-saving paddle AND hold onto the granola bar for dear life (it's food! and it has chocolate chips in it!) if we should fall out of the raft.
3. If I am with you, we WILL fall out of the raft. I think because dirty, freezing water with gross things in it likes me a lot.

My husband actually texted the poor guy who arranged the whole thing and made the mistake of inviting us. He was excited to be mentioned in the acknowledgments and promised to "single-handedly make Dead River a bestseller in Maine." After he gets over the trauma of reliving that terrible event. So if you live in Maine, please do not let this guy down.

This is the cover blurb:

My friends and I are spending prom weekend at a remote wooded cabin on the Dead. The Dead River.

I thought it was going to be just us.

I was wrong.

Nothing is what it seems in this creepy paranormal thriller by Cyn Balog.

I know!  Doesn't it sound like Jason will be involved? He isn't, but that would probably be just my luck if I ever decided to go rafting on the Dead again. Jason shows up in his freaky hockey mask, or creepy hands come out of the water a la the cover. Trust me, you do not want to go with me next time.  Which, there will NOT be a next time. For the above reasons.

If you would like to check it out, go here.  And I can't lie, I would love if you would buy a copy, too.

Also, Nichola Reilly, that little vixen, is working on her 2014 edits and just gearing up to write the sequel! Gosh, I hate talking about myself in the third person. No wonder writers are crazy.

A Tale of One Author, Two Names

Today I'm announcing some very exciting news (well, for me, anyway!).

Children's: Young Adult
Cyn Balog writing as Nichola Reilly's DREAM KINGDOM, set in a future flooded world in which the heroine and her island people must all climb onto a precarious platform at high tide or be swept away and drowned -- or worse, attacked by deadly ocean predators -- and the secrets kept by the ruling class may be the end of their dwindling society, to Annie Stone and Natashya Wilson at Harlequin Teen, in a two-book deal, by Jim McCarthy at Dystel & Goderich Literary Mana gement.

This is big news for me, and makes me probably more proud than any other deal I've made, because last year was really tough on me, personally. I'd written this book many years ago, but it took awhile before it felt ready for the world.  Also, despite being published, which I always thought would make me feel like the Queen Master of the Universe, I still felt like a poser who knew nothing about how to write. There were many times I never thought I'd ever publish again, and I even tried to walk away. But in the end, I realized that if I just need to do what makes me happy, and accept whatever happens after it, good or bad. This is one of the good things.

People have asked why I am writing under a pen name, and there are a number of small reasons that made it the best choice. The biggest of those is that it's a departure from paranormal and supernatural romance. It's post-apocalyptic fantasy, about a girl named Coe who has to overcome enormous odds to save the remaining members of her diminishing society. It is a very odd thing, though, to be writing under a pen name, and so I am sure people may wonder if they call me Cyn or Nichola or what, but hey, just don't call me big fat loser, and I'm good. :)

Also, it will be my very first series. I do not know why I'm so late to the series party... actually, I do. It's hard work. Series writers, you have my kudos! I'm hoping that both books from the series will be released in 2014, so you won't have to wait too long between them, because that drives me crazy, too. Well, I suppose I should just hope that you'll WANT to read the second book. Like I said, writing series = crazy hard. And I have not even really delved too deeply into the second book, yet. I am going to have a busy summer!

Thank you for reading my news. And it would mean a lot to me if you'd follow me on twitter and facebook, where I will be posting more updates about this book (I'm not calling it anything right now because the title is undergoing reconstruction!), Twitter: @NicholaReilly (I'll follow you back), or like my fan page on facebook.

Music to Write By

Every once in awhile, someone will ask me what my playlist was while I was writing a certain book. Or, they will show me a song on YouTube and say that it fits my book perfectly.  I love that people can think of songs that make them feel a certain way, and tie that into my book.

But honestly, I don't have a playlist for any of my books, because I don't listen to music while I write. Believe me, I've tried, because I love music, but if the music has lyrics, I'll usually end up incorporating them into my manuscript! So for me, it's either silence or classical.

However, that's not to say that I'm not inspired by music.  One of the main influences for TOUCHED is, and I'm sure you're heard it before if you've been to a wedding in the past few years, The Luckiest by Ben Folds, because it explores the topic of fate:

And I know that I heard this song about 4 gazillion times, and so a lot of the sentiment behind it, the idea of going through any torture just to see the one you love, got engrained in FAIRY TALE:

 

 

 

Also, whenever I don't feel like writing because I feel like I'm not good enough, I use this song as a reminder that I'm not alone in this:

So as you can see, it's usually me hearing a song over and over again that the idea behind it gets in my head and ends up inspiring some of my writing. Maybe one of these days I will be able to write to music with lyrics, but until then . . .

The Book You Want to Read

Recently, I've spent WAY too much time analyzing trends, what's been selling, what hasn't been, and trying to apply that to my own books.

That's really freaking stupid.

Okay, it's important to be knowledgeable about the business, sure. But I think I had more success in letting the best-sellers write what they wanted, and just sticking to writing what I wanted.  It was way more fun, too.

That was my one rule when I first started: I would write the kind of book that Teen Me wanted to read. I'm lucky in the fact that Teen Me and Me are actually quite similar, as I still don't consider myself a full-fledged master of adulthood. The book Teen Me wanted to read, coincidentally, is nowhere near what is popular these days, for these reasons:

1. It was somewhat short. I remember finishing up a LONG day of homework, and the first thing I wanted to do was sit down with a book. But I also loved the feeling of satisfaction I got from finishing a book, especially when I could do it in one sitting. I didn't want overly complicated. I didn't want massive subplots. I wanted a nice little story, and  . . .
2. It had a beginning, middle, and definite end.  No cliffhanger endings. No sequels. When it ended, I got to work in my head where it went. I didn't have to wait and agonize for the next part.  And also . . .
3. That ending . . . it was happy. What can I say...  when I was a teen and my life was full of so much trauma, I liked happy. And I liked happy endings. Mostly because
4. I had a very goofy side, and liked to laugh.  My books had to have a little dose of goofy in it. I'm a goofy person. I don't do angst really well. Writing serious scenes is hard for me because I am so tempted to throw in a stupid joke, to lighten the mood. 
5. It wasn't about vampires, or witches, or anything else that's been "done" before.

If you'll notice, loooong, angst-ridden series seem to be in these days. That's what's popular. Or at least, that's what the gatekeepers, the ones who talk to teens and say, "This is what you'd like," would have us think.

But I don't think all teens like that.  I know that Teen Me would have one word for what's popular these days:  Ew.

So I am going to keep focusing on writing the book that I want to read. If it's not popular, that's okay. At least I know that Teen Me would read it, and she would be proud.

Objects in the Mirror . . .

About a decade or so ago, I had a bunch of stressful things happening in my life.  So I a) never ate and b) exercised all the time, which was a really bad combination, probably just as bad as eating too much and never exercising. Anyway, as a result, I was this little twiggy, unhealthy, size-0 thing.

But I can still remember, very clearly, sitting in the passenger seat of my husband's car as we travelled, looking at the reflection on the side window. Of the flesh of my thighs, spreading out across the seat.

And I thought, "Ew. I'm fat."

But I was a size zero.

Now as a healthy and normal size 8, I'll look at pictures of myself back then and think how positively skeletal I was. How sick I was.

This is something I remind myself of when I'm writing. When I read my work back to myself and think, "Wow, this stinks."

We are too close to ourselves, and to anything we create. We can not see it accurately. At least, not without stepping away from it for a few weeks or months.

I know some writers operate without critique partners. I am really not sure how they do it, and I'd love to know.  I will occassionally think something I write is awesome and learn from my trusted friends that it is not. More often, I will think something I wrote is terrible, and learn that it actually isn't so bad. But I really have no idea, most of the time, where my stuff rates on the Suck-o-meter. Even after five books. No idea. I doubt I ever will.

I don't think it helps that writing is so subjective, and that one person's trash is another person's favorite book of all time. Often I'll send a book in after edits, thinking it needs another couple of drafts, only to be horrified that it was accepted and moved on to copyedits. I want to scream, "No, not yet!" hold it to myself as tight as I can, do a takeback. But it's too late. I try to comfort myself, "My editor is a pro, she knows when a book is ready."  But most often I wallow in the thought of all the changes I could've made, that would have made it so much better.

It's so easy to see the flaws in yourself. So easy.

It's impossible to write a book without flaws, at least in someone's eyes.

A decade or so ago, I always had my husband, pulling me from the brink, telling me that I was perfect, just the way I was. Not that I was too thin, or too fat. In his eyes, I was more than my weight. I was perfect.

And now I have critique partners that do the same thing for me. So someone says my books are too short. So someone says my characters are whiners. So someone says that scene was too unbelievable. They tell me my books are more than that one character, or that one scene. And while my books may not be perfect to everyone, they may just be perfect for someone.

And that's enough for me. It should be enough for anyone. I hope it's enough for you.

And I hope you find yourself a wonderful critique partner. They are worth SO much.

XO,
Cyn

Stuff. Yeah, I know that makes this entry sound so compelling, you have to read it.

Some have looked at my rather blank Events page and asked me when my next signing is, and well . . . not for a little while, I guess. I'm speaking to librarians early next month, but after that . . . big black hole of signings!  I had a really nice one with Josh Berk and Elisa Ludwig last weekend, and it was lots of fun. The Exton BAM is great.  Here's a pic (big thanks to Michelle for her pic-taking skills):

 

 



I may have more eventually, and if I do, I'll post my schedule here.

I also wanted to make a mention to certain fans of mine.  Notably, foreign fans. I am getting the NICEST emails from readers outside the US who are interested in seeing my books in their country. Actually, a lot of them. A lot lot lot of them, so many that I'm having a bit of a lag responding to them all. If you are one of those people, I want to thank you so much for your interest, as it means so much to me that my book has captured your attention.  For awhile, I tried to keep up with these requests. Unfortunately, now, my pocket book is so small (I am a writer, after all), and I'm unable to send mail overseas. I really, really, apologize for this, as I welcome all your emails and am so flattered by your interest.  But I also have a family to feed. :) But again, thank you! Right now, you can find some of my books in the US, Canada, Hungary, Germany, and Italy... but I hope that one day my books will be available in your corner of the world, too.

I hope you all are having a lovely September.

XO, Cyn

Bow Down Before Me, Fools!

It has come to my attention that some of the world thinks that I am an egotistical jerk because of my response to the person who contacted me regarding the titling of Dead River.

Why, yes, I am. I am SOOOOOO important, being published by a Big-6 publisher, and you all, if you are not, are nothing.

I've found there is no way for me to say who my publisher is without looking like a big, conceited blow-hard, which is why I deleted part of the post. (Thank goodness for screen shots!) Actually, here's the thing: Being published by a major publisher does not make an author feel better than anyone else-- in fact, usually, it scares the crap out of them.

I know, boo-hoo-hoo, you got paid to write and aw it's so awful. Go shut up now, Cyn. I'll admit, that part is awesome! But:

Firstly, when it happens, you think that you're a fluke. You think that just about anyone in the world, even a few monkeys working in a room round the clock for a year, can ALSO be published by a major publisher, if only the stars aligned correctly.

Secondly, because of the first point, you live in fear that you will never have another book published. You likely got an okay advance, and so your life is devoted to making sure that advance earns out to please the "Big Publisher Gods" that you "work" for.  You become a slave to the numbers, because you want to make this your career and you want your bosses to be happy with you and not think you're a big turd. 

Thirdly, because you are not Suzanne Collins, you did not get as much promotion as you would have expected from a large publisher. In fact, you probably got next to nothing. And so while you are sitting at a signing twiddling your thumbs and watching people snatch your bookmarks away and use them as tissues, you think of all the money that YOU YOURSELF put into those bookmarks, and wonder if you should have spent ALL your advance money on promoting yourself, instead of half of it. You set up a blog and a website and a facebook and twitter account even though you don't like all that crap and are a very private person, just because you know that's what they expect of you. You wrack your head trying to think of things to tell people that are interesting, so they don't forget about you and your books, and meanwhile because you are a social nitwit you make it seem like you are a conceited jerk who hates reviewers and writers and basically anyone who might read your book.

Fourthly, also because you are not Suzanne Collins, when your editor tells you to change this, you change it.  When they tell you to go to this place, you go there. When they tell you to spin around in circles while patting your head and rubbing your belly, you do that, too. Because they know what they're doing... they work for a well-known publisher, after all. And I could be a monkey. I don't pretend for one moment that I have any sparkling knowledge or talent that nobody else has. This isn't about "art", and about how sparkly and wondrous and unique your prose is, and how like murdering baby chipmunks it would be to alter it. It's about business. It's about you-and-your-work-are-not-divine. It's about what will sell. And the team at a publisher works hard to figure that out. So I couldn't change the title of Dead River if I wanted to. It's in my publisher's hands. If they thought it would sell better if it were called Poop River, I'd go with it. Reluctantly.

Those are what I can think of off the top of my head. I know I am hugely fortunate to have been published by a major publisher, and NOT the other way around-- it's a dream I've had since I was a kid. Despite the above, it's still wonderful. And it's one I know that anyone can experience, should they choose, with the right amount of luck and patience.  And maybe a monkey.